Reader Question:
we came across men online who resides 500 kilometers away. He is 34 and that I’m 53. He performed let me know he’d a woman he dated “locally” and that he had been simply on the site finding friends. 90 days later we noticed we thoughts for each and every various other.
At the same time, he still shows he’s having issues together with his girl, who’s not somebody he’s “dating” in your area. He’s living with their plus they’ve already been together for four decades.
At long last determined we’d meet up with to see if this was really worth following. He gave me the primary reason the guy didn’t imagine it absolutely was directly to exercise as he was still together with her. I finally offered him an ultimatum and informed him i possibly couldn’t play next fiddle. The guy professed their love but said he had been very baffled.
Perform we give him ultimatum, it is this lady or me personally? Was we wrong to inquire of him in order to make that choice?
-Nancy (Fl)
Dr Wendy Walsh’s Response:
Oh Nancy, Nancy, Nancy! You blogged in my opinion for sincerity, correct? Really, are you sitting yourself down? Because right here will come a honey pot of truth.
You might be located in fantasy land, my personal dear woman. You’ve not also came across this person who might or might not end up being a person and whom might or might not have a girlfriend.
I very suggest the thing is the documentary “Catfish” (available on iTunes and Netflix) about an online love con.
But even although you cannot do this, let’s assume for a moment he’s in fact just who he says they are and ignore the fact the guy began writing to you personally by sleeping about his connection condition.
Why don’t we just check out the so-called basic facts.
A.) He’s almost 2 decades more youthful than you.
B.) He is in a life threatening relationship.
C.) He told you from the beginning he’s only seeking be friends.
Therefore I want to know, the reason why do you really risk the cardiovascular system on these types of an awful wager?
Practical question really should not be about offering him an ultimatum, but rather, if you allow yourself the really love you deserve?
If that’s the case, next this isn’t the horse you really need to drive to the sunset with. Operate, girl!
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